An Analysis Of Santa.

Santa's Deere, November, 2009
Santa’s Deere, November, 2009 by Maggie Osterberg, on Flickr

After a close reading of several different maps of the Arctic, close scrutiny of the current series of treaties and land claims, days spent pouring over the historical record of sightings and observed behavior, and taking especially close notice of the red and green uniforms worn by subordinates, I believe I am able to definitively able to identify the nationality of Kris “Santa Claus” Kringle aka “Father Christmas” aka “Saint Nick.”

The North Pole and “Santa’s Workshop” are a United Federation of Planets Starfleet observation post. Admiral Kringle has steadfastly adhered to the Prime Directive, while gently bringing joy and planting seeds of hope in the children of Earth.

Admiral Kringle also holds the distinction of being the oldest living non-Vulcan Redshirt in Starfleet, too.

Happy Christmas and live long and prosper!

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